Something Old: Eden's Diner

AMIE

An entire book in one week.  That’s unbelievable!

CLANCY

(mumbling under AMIE’s comments)

It’s impossible.  Insanity.  It can’t be done.

AMIE

Any idea what you’re going to do?

CLANCY

No. (sits)  I have nothing.  It’s impossible.  A WHOLE book in a single week?  (Rests forehead on the table)  Nothing’s coming to me.

AMIE

That’s called writer’s block.  Nothing ever comes to you.  You always need to find a “muse.”  But you’re just stressed out.  And you can’t write about nothing.  Why don’t you write about…a writer with writer’s block?

CLANCY

 (rests chin on the table, after a pause)

That sounds oddly familiar…But you know I can’t leave my protagonist alive at the end.

AMIE

He could kill himself.

CLANCY

No.

(forehead on the table)

AMIE

Alright.  Then why don’t you write about that murder that happened recently?

CLANCY

What murder?

AMIE

Didn’t you hear?

(REPORTER enters, and CLANCY isn’t really paying attention.)

REPORTER

This just in.  (mouths words) of (mouths)  Publishing Company has just been found in his office with several bizarre stab wounds in his back.  No word yet on possible suspects or the weapon used in this murder, OR when it could have occurred, but we will keep you updated.

In other news, theatre students from Loyola Academy---

AMIE

(cutting off REPORTER.  REPORTER exits.) 

It’s either that one or the one involving the cat.

CLANCY

 (chin on the table)

 I wouldn’t know which one to pick.

AMIE

You should definitely go with the backstabber.  (Gestures vaguely.) There seems to be a lot of explanation needed for that one.

CLANCY

(Pause)

And the cat murder is self-explanatory?

AMIE

(shrugs)

It’d make a good story.  Use your imagination.

CLANCY

You sound like a kindergarten teacher.  It’s impossible.  I could never pull it off with so little time.

Pause

Well, what are you going to do?

AMIE

I’ve got a couple ideas I’ve been tossing around.  I’m just worried about where you’re going to find inspiration.  For the sake of competition, of course.  I mean, I hate to beat you without you even trying.

CLANCY

 (Sarcastic)

 Of course.  I’ll think of something.  Possibly.  Maybe I’ll find something under “inspiration” in the yellow pages.