Dance, dance...

Q:  What is the last song you danced to?

A:  To be quite honest, I'm not sure.

Q:  What, do you dance a lot?  I thought you couldn't dance.

A:  I can't dance.  I do, however, dance in the car.

Q:  While you're driving?

A:  While I'm driving.  It's pretty much the best thing ever.

Q:  This exchange isn't going to make a very compelling blog post...

A:  Yeah, I know, that's why I'm going to tell you about a particular time that I danced that was fun.

Q:  You probably scandalized the masses.

A:  Oh, I did.

Okay, so when I was on my way home from the Disney College Program, my chauffeur and I went to Universal Studios.  Specifically, Islands of Adventure for the Wizarding World of Harry Potter.  Naturally.  By the end of the day, I had a wicked headache because I hadn't worn a hat and I didn't drink enough water.  So it was my own fault.

On our way out, we were walking through the Streets of Universal because that's the only way to get to the parking lots.  Over the loud speakers and drifting over the entire area was Carly Rae Jepsen's "Call Me Maybe."  (Don't lie, you know you have a secret love of this song.)  Right there on the Streets of Universal, I belted out "Call Me Maybe" and dance-walked all the way over to the parking lots.  I'm pretty sure I made a little bit of a scene, but that made it about eight billion times better.  It was a lot of fun trying to get my friend to dance with me, and just...good times.  I remember it like it was only yesterday....

"Those who dance are considered insane by those who cannot hear the music."

- George Carlin

A Letter to/from My Valentine

Even though I technically asked and was accepted as a valentine for my mother, sometimes you just have to write some mushy stuff.  I know it's probably trite and I'm probably contradicting my post from last year, but you know...here goes nothing.

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Valentine I Wish I Would Get:

Dearest Brianna,

It feels as though it's been weeks since I heard your voice when in reality it hasn't even been one week.  And now it's Valentine's Day.  And I know how you feel about Valentine's Day, so for I'll count the cliches for you when they come up.

You mean the world to me (1).  No joke.  If it came down to whether I would want you or the world, well, you would be more portable.

I can't imagine myself with anyone else but you (2) although if Angelina Jolie came calling, I might have to go running.  We have to have our principles here and I figure if I tell you in advance, you won't be able to argue with me when it happens.

In short, love, let's go have adventures and make the most out of life (3).

I love you, happy Valentine's day.

Love,
Random Imaginary (preferably British) Gentleman

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Valentine I Wish I Would Send:

Dear love,

Yesterday I started writing thank you notes for the presents I got for Christmas, and because you know me so well, you're going to keep your mouth shut about thank you notes being most effective when they come right after the holiday they belong to...  Anyway, the point is that because I'm kind of in a more thankful mood than I usually am, this will probably end up being a thank you note rather than a love letter, so I apologize if you were getting your hopes up.

Thank you.

Thank you for understanding me enough to know that you have to let me ride the shopping cart in the parking lot, and if you don't I'll probably pout.  Thank you for letting me drag you down every single aisle in the grocery store because it amuses me.

Thank you for letting me play.  It's taken me a really long time to find someone like you who is willing to let me play.  You once told me that you didn't see the point in becoming an adult if you couldn't be childish sometimes, and I'm pretty sure that that's when I fell for you.  And the best part is, you don't just let me play, you join in.  You pun with me, and I love that about you.  I was always afraid that I would end up with someone who would crush my soul and force me to write stuffy poetry, but you make me want to go on adventures with you and stay up all night eating candy.

Thank you for using British-isms and/or being British yourself.  You know that that's exactly what I love, and you use it to your advantage.  It's perfect.  Seriously.  Don't ever stop.  And thank you for understanding that if David Tennant comes into my life, I will leave you.  And even if you don't really understand, thank you for allowing that this is a reality.

Thank you for kissing me to shut me up when I'm on a rant.  Oh wait.  That's me.  Um.  Well, thank you for letting me kiss you to shut you up?  :^P

Thank you for writing to me.  I've always had a list of things that I would want my perfect man to be and do, and writing to me is up there.  I love the letters and the postcards and the e-mails, I love that we're in contact outside of text messages because I have to admit that I love reading the words that you physically wrote on a piece of paper for me.  It's kinda awesome.  You don't have to write me poetry, but I love that you do, it makes me melt.

Thank you for supporting me, especially when I'm being irrational.  Thank you for holding me and calming my panic especially when you don't understand what the big deal is anyway.  Because I know it's dumb.  And I know that I worry without reason, but sometimes it's just something I need to do.  Thank you for being there.

Thank you for not giving up on me.

Love,
Brianna

HAPPY VALENTINE'S DAY!

To all the lovers, to all the romantics, to all those looking for love, or to those who have lost it, may you have a wonderful day full of sunshine and warmth.  And don't forget about discounted candy tomorrow!

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PROMPT:
Write your own valentine you wish you would send or receive!

"I'll love you, dear, I'll love you till China and Africa meet and the river jumps over the mountain and the salmon sing in the street."

- W.H. Auden

Life as a Pixar Movie

There was a time when my friend posed the question:

If your life was a Pixar movie, what movie would your's be?

I struggled with this question mostly because the best Pixar movies had been taken, and I couldn't think of a way to relate my life to Toy Story or Up, which was sad.  And there was no way I was going to use A Bug's Life.

The conclusion I came to was that my life is Ratatouille. 

And now is when I put up the obligatory ***SPOILER ALERT*** because I'm going to talk about plot, characters, and other things.  And though I'm not sure if there are people who would care if I spoil...but you know...just making sure.

Anyway.

I definitely feel like Remy in that I feel like I have a talent, but I'm in an environment that isn't exactly fostering that talent or encouraging it.  One might say that I feel creatively stifled by where I am in my life.  So in that way, I'm faced with the challenge of finding a means through which I can use my gifts.

Then again, I also feel like Linguini because I don't always have Remy's confidence in my own talents, and sometimes I just feel like everything I'm doing is going wrong and subsequently leading me in the completely wrong direction.  But I'm eager to learn and develop as an artist, I just need a mentor of sorts.

Plus I feel like I'm surrounded by Colettes, the people who know exactly what they're doing and where they're going.  They're unflappable, and they're so staggeringly confident in themselves that I fall over myself to please them or prove that I'm even a little okay.  Then again, when I do that, I'm less true to myself and I end up coming up with art that's not too great because I'm making it for someone that's not me.  Some of my best friends are Colettes.  Or I feel like they're Colettes because I have a huge inferiority [hush] complex.

And that's all I really have because I need to think more.  Basically the gist is that I'm still coming to terms with my own talent and gifts, so I'm mixing things up a bit as I figure things out.

"I know this sounds insane, but... well, the truth sounds insane sometimes, but that doesn't mean it's not. Uh, the, the truth. And the truth is, I have no talent at all." 

- Linguini, 'Ratatouille'

Poetical Anniversary

It's official.  Today marks the one year anniversary of my Poem-A-Day Project.  Exactly one year ago, I was walking with a friend and we decided to write one poem a day for the month of September.  The rest, as they say, is history.

Actually, all through the project, I've spent every month going back and forth about whether I would continue on.  Would I write more than one month or would it stop after September?  Would I do more than six months?  Might as well finish up the school year, should I continue over the summer?  I'm not sure where all this indecision comes from, but if I had to guess it would be because of the endless doubt in my ability to produce more poems.  Because some months are just altogether rotten, and some of those months I'd really like to forget.  Oh, that and the fact that continuing the project always sounded crazy.

Stranger:  You've been writing daily poems for how long?
Me:  A year.
Stranger:  (wide eyes)  No way.

A professor at the university I just graduated from told me that he was considering creating a class around the idea of writing one poem a day with the thought of producing sheer quantity of material to work with.  He said that he wasn't sure that a college student could handle it with all their other commitments and things, but that hearing I had been maintaining the project for months on end, he thought that maybe he could create a class like that after all.  These are the things that make me happy.

Additionally, I'm trying to get my friends to pick up on a Poem-A-Day Project of their own.  I've sent out a challenge to my poetically minded friends to write one poem a day for the month of September, just like how I started out a year ago.  If they continue after this month will be up to them, but I'm hoping the experience in and of itself will be as good for them as it was for me.

Stranger:  But what are you going to do with those over 300 poems and poem scraps that you've written?

Well, like any good writer, I'm going to keep them.  I plan on also revising them, but since I'm miles and miles away from my collection of poems, that's going to have to wait until I return home.  I'm excited about the prospect of revision, but I'm not quite sure where I'm going to get feedback and critique.  We shall see.

Stranger:  What now?

Since I'm still participating in the Disney College Program, and there are still tons of poems to be written about that experience as well as the experience of living away from home for the first time out of college and all of that, I'm going to continue the Poem-A-Day Project into the rest of 2012.  Once January 1st rolls around, I'll probably go back to flip-flopping about whether I'll continue after that, but for now I want to keep going and that excitement for the project will hopefully keep me going for the next couple months.

This month my Poem-A-Day Project challenge will be to revise 2 poems a week from either my freshman year Creative Writing class or my sophomore year Writing Poetry class.  The first being when I was still grumpy about writing poetry, and the second being when I started thinking that poetry was a little bit better than "okay."  My style has changed quite a bit since both of those classes, so I'm excited to go back and read what I wrote originally and also to see what the new revisions will look like.

No matter what this project has in store for me, I know it's going to be an adventure, that's for sure.

"Poetry is thoughts that breathe, and words that burn."

- Thomas Gray

Poems for a Year

It dawned on me.  While I was writing my Poem-A-Day for today.

On September 1, 2012, I will have written a year's worth of Poem-A-Days.  

366 poems, because 2012's a leap year.

And as I had my pen resting on the loose leaf which in turn was sitting on the grainy computer desk, I thought the very profound thought of, "That's a lot of poems."  Then my brain proceeded to melt inside its casing and ooze out every possible escape route out of my head.  Now I have gray matter to mop up and tease out of the keyboard, and I still have the realization that I'm going to have written over 100 poems.  Over 200 poems.  In fact, I will have written over 300 poems and be well on my way to writing 400.  And that's huge.  If it was all about quantity, I would be on the road to writing myself an eternity's worth of poems.

The real truth of the matter is that it's actually about quality.  I'm not going to say that I think all my poems are awesome.  And I'm also not going to say that I think they're all trash.  Most of them are somewhere in the middle, and with revision, they can definitely be either "okay" or "superb."  Point being, I've got a lot of material to work with, and that thought is overwhelming.  I may never have to write an original poem again... And even after typing that, I realize that it's not true.  Of course I'm going to write more poems.  I'm not just going to say "These 366 are it, I'm never writing anything new ever again," because that would put me in a terrible place when I'm far away from the college life and I'm still revising poems about graduation stress.  So for the sake of keeping myself out of a time vortex, I will still write poetry even after this Poem-A-Day Project is done.

So I'll be done with this Poem-A-Day Project.  I realize that the year is a little illogical based on the fact that it goes along with the school year rather than the regular calendar year that normal people use, but part of me is alright with that.  The other part of me wants to call it Poem-A-Day 2012 and get it over with.  You know, just keep writing until January 1st.  I'm playing with this idea, I haven't decided yet.

And then there's another part of my oozed puddle brain that asks, "Are you going to keep going?"  Will I just keep writing one poem per day and keep going until some undetermined date?  Is there enough paper for that?  Should I change my system somehow?  Maybe I could use recycled paper instead?  Or my recycled notebooks....hm.  Should I keep going?  There are definitely perks to keeping up with the Poem-A-Day Project because it gives me some reliable way of expressing myself.  I know that if I have something that's on my mind, I can sort it out in a poem, or rant about it in poetic form.  And I still have so much to learn when it comes to imagery and form and making my poems actually sound pretty in addition to being silly.  It's been nice writing these poems during my last year of college because it gave me a way of remembering what was on my mind at the time I was writing that poem and what I was stressed or excited about.  I can look back and get right back into that mindset.  The cons all revolve around resources.  For paper and pens (because let's face it, are there really enough pens and paper in the world to sustain a Poem-A-Day Project for a Brianna who will live until who knows when?).  For ideas.  This is the biggest problem with my being at home this summer.  I don't see a lot of people outside of my family, and I don't get out very often, so I don't see a lot of new things.  So my poems are either really odd or really dumb because they're about the same eight things that I always write about when I'm at home.  And there's nothing really new going on.  Although when I start the job search...there will be plenty of material and ideas there, there have just gotta be.  And then there's my five month stay in Orlando, FL for the Disney College Program.  That HAS to be a goldmine for creativity.

So it's coming up, the end of one year's worth of poems for Brianna.  Will she continue till January?  Will she continue until some undetermined date?  Or will she just stop and call it a year?  The answers to come soon...

"I've written some poetry I don't understand myself."

- Carl Sandburg

I Wish to Go to the Festival...and the Ball!

Q:  What's this about a ball?

A:  I'm going to a ball!

Q:  A ball?

A:  You don't have to be so surprised about it.  Don't people get invited to balls all the time?  Don't the dreams of every young girl culminate in dancing with a prince at a ball and transforming into Cinderella?  Don't you ride in pumpkin carriages to balls every time you fall asleep?  Okay, maybe not the last one, but the rest are true, right?

Tonight I'm going to a ball.  The Printer's Ball, actually.

When my friends and I went to the Printer's Row Lit Fest earlier this summer, we were walking around, gazing longingly at the scrumptious leather bound books and the beautiful journals and the tiny little car crammed with books, and we happened upon the Poetry Foundation table.  Now I had heard that the Poetry Foundation was in the process of establishing an address downtown because I have my sources, but I had no idea that they would have a table at the Lit Fest.  And my being a great fan of the Poetry Foundation, I decided to drag my friends over, and we chatted with the literary folks running the table.  They gave us a bunch of free stuff (including a button with a Pegasus on it) and also a flyer for the Printer's Ball which they described as the biggest party for literary people in Chicago, where you need to bring a very large bag to carry all the free stuff you'll get.

We decided then and there that we would go.

When I looked up the Printer's Ball online, I found that it was themed.  "It's Aliiiiiiive!"  And also that costumes are encouraged because there would be a costume contest.  I had no idea what I would dress up as.  I had a list that looked something like this:
- Cat in the Hat
- Hester Prynne
- Miss Havisham (even though I've never read Great Expectations)
- Mary Poppins
- Nancy Drew
- Tonks
- Jane Eyre
- Mrs. Bennet
And on and on.  I consulted my mother, and she added to my list, but no decisions were made.  Until this week when my mom said, "Let's face it, Miss Havisham is the best costume on this list.  Let's do it."  And I said okay.

So we adventured to the local Salvation Army with the view of picking out a wedding dress.  The only dresses that were hanging from the ceiling that looked vaguely bridal were over our budget of $20-40, so we went into the aisles where we found multiple white dresses, none of them fitting until we found The One.  Which was cream, but perfect, and a high collared shirt I could wear under it to give the appearance of a high collar on the dress itself.  Turns out the dress was "missing a piece" (apparently) and we got it for $7.50 instead of $15.  A bargain.

I then ventured to my "local" library in the nearest suburb with my mother's library card, and I got Great Expectations, the book on tape.  Which I learned had 17 hours and 28 minutes worth of some man reading the book aloud and providing voices for each character.  And just looking through the DVDs on a whim (because the website had told me the movie was checked out), I found that the website had lied to me and I could watch the movie if it turned out that "reading" Great Expectations in a matter of three days wasn't doable.  (Though I'm happy to say that I'm 3/4 of the way through and the ball is tonight.)

The last couple days I went searching for suitable shoes and tights for my costume, to no avail.  Until yesterday, after offending the people at Fantasy Costumes by asking for a pair of slippers, I found a pair of decent white shoes.  Now all I need is the tights.

And tonight I put on my veil and my wrinkles, and I go to the ball.  A modern Cinderella dressed as a sadistic, cruel, old hag, Miss Havisham.  I'm certain to meet my Prince Charming (or Mr. Darcy) at this assembly.  Fingers crossed Miss Havisham doesn't interfere.

"Oh well.  What's a royal ball?  After all, I suppose it would be frightfully dull, and-and-and boring, and-and completely...Completely wonderful."

- Cinderella (Disney's 1950 version)

Disney Favorites

Q:  What is your favorite Disney movie of all time and why?/Who is your favorite Disney character?

A:  My favorite Disney movie for some time was Sleeping Beauty, and I think that might have been because it was Mom's favorite Disney movie, and I wanted to be just like her.  I'm also a fan of Beauty and the Beast, Mulan, and Brother Bear (though my mother laughs at me every time I say the last one).

Since about sophomore year of high school, or whenever it was that I got the movie for my birthday, I have LOVED Lilo and Stitch, making my favorite character(s) the two title characters.  I love the animation with all the rounded bubbly edges, and I love the script (because it's absolutely brilliant).

Lilo: It's Sandwich Day.
Hula Instructor: .....
Lilo: (deep breath) Every Thursday I bring Pudge the Fish a peanut butter sandwich.  But today we were out of peanut butter!  So I asked my sister what I should give him and she said a tuna sandwich!  Do you know what tuna is?
Hula Instructor:  Fish?
Lilo:  It's fish!  If I gave Pudge tuna, I'd be an abomination!  So I'm late because I had to go to the store to get peanut butter because all we had was...was stinking tuna!!!
Hula Instructor:  Lilo, why is this so important to you?
Lilo:  Pudge controls the weather.

Most of all I enjoy how absolutely adorable the relationship between Lilo and Stitch is.  It's fascinating to see the relationship between a small Elvis-loving Hawaiian girl and a convict from outer space develop.  Plus the aliens are pretty cool.  I'm always a sucker for a good alien.  (See Doctor Who.  I rest my case.)  I genuinely enjoy watching Lilo and Stitch every single time I watch the movie because I always manage to forget something about the plot or the little things that happen in between scenes, and it opens my eyes to the magical experience all over again.  I may or may not have a new appreciation for Elvis all because of this movie.  I feel that I should like at least a good part of his music if I'm going to watch Lilo and Stitch because so much of the soundtrack features The King.

So right now (even though I haven't seen it in a while), my favorite is Lilo and Stitch.  I even dressed up as Lilo and brought my Stitch to a Disney themed birthday party while I was in high school (back when I had super long hair):

Myself on the left, and Belle on the right!

Plus it's such a comfy outfit, it's hard to resist wearing it on a daily basis.  If I had enough floral dresses, maybe I would.  There's really no telling.

And it's a smart, touching movie.  Really beautiful.  Love!

But recently, since I only just saw Tangled, I'm growing to like that quite a bit too.  I wanted so much to make The Princess and the Frog my favorite, but it didn't hold the same magic for me that Lilo and Stitch does.  Anyway, I love Tangled, and I'll have to purchase it and watch it over and over and over again to see if it lasts like Lilo and Stitch.

"Ohana means family.  Family means no one gets left behind.  Or forgotten."

- Lilo and Stitch

A Letter to Prince Charming

Dear Prince Charming,

My name is Brianna; I got your P.O. box address from a friend of mine (you might know her, then again you might not, she's the one sitting on the couch behind a book as big as her head) and I would like to take this chance to say a couple things.  For your convenience, I shall number them.

One.  I would like to compliment you on your perfection.  You really are spectacular.  It's alarming how charming...you are.  I would love to know who designs your wardrobe, because I'd like to talk to them about a wardrobe for myself.  Anyway.  You're perfect.  Not only are you devilishly attractive, but you're witty, intelligent, alluring, brave, adventurous, self-assured, and of course, highly desirable.  In fact, everyone's looking for you.  That brings me to my second comment.

Two.  Where are you?  I keep hearing about people looking for you, and I have to admit that I picked up a raggedy map that promised it would divulge your location, but I probably would have been better off using a GPS.  You seem to be lost in some unplottable location because I haven't seen on any Facebook statuses that someone's found you.  I would have thought I would hear by now.  If you've been lost for so long, it's only a matter of time that someone'll find you.  Maybe you should hold a press conference and give some clues as to where someone can find you.  Only the cleverest or most devious people need apply, unless you have clones that you can give to the less than worthy.

Three.  Where did you come from?  If you can't tell me where you are, the least you can do is tell me where you're from.  I'm guessing you're not from an alien planet or a different dimension (unless you're The Doctor), but you had to come from somewhere.  Who are your parents?  I get the feeling that you were raised by Optimism and Imagination with Disney as a close godfather who came over for dinner weekly.  Nurtured on the food of dreams, happy thoughts and pixie dust seasoning, you grew up to be your perfect self.  The most desired man in the world, right next to Mr. Right.  Unless of course you're the same person, but that's another question altogether.

Four.  What are you looking for?  Brains?  Brawn?  Beauty?  I know a couple people who would be prime candidates for your consideration, so if you're interested, you should really give me a call: ***/***-****.

Five.  What are you waiting for?  I find it really interesting that girls and women of all ages are looking for you, even though the majority of them wish to be pursued by you.  So are you waiting for them to find you so you can give chase?  But what if you're tired of the chase?  Where does that leave your ardent admirers?  I can tell you right now that if you just come out of hiding for a little while, you're bound to get laid almost immediately.  I say "almost" because it might take a little time for clothes to be torn off, but all the same, you'd be in pretty good shape considering you're in high demand.  If someone were selling you, they should hike up the price because there's only one of you, and everyone wants you.  Just think of the profit that people could make off of you...  (Cynical Brianna pipes up and points out that's how Godfather Disney did it.)

Six.  This may be a radical idea, and you might not agree, or this paragraph might be the reason why you don't write back to me, but can I be my own Prince Charming?  Theoretically, all I have to do is transfer those complements I gave you to me, and then I could be devilishly attractive, witty, intelligent, etc.  I'm not talking narcissism here, I'm talking self-love, which is a milder and healthier form of narcissism.  Would that be cool?  Would you be okay with that?  I'm saying that if I become the type of person I would find desirable, would you come out of hiding and introduce yourself?  Then there's the whole thing that maybe I would be too much like you that we couldn't get along, but we could work it out, right?  But if I become my own Prince Charming, will I still need you?  I also wonder if there will be other people in the world that will be drawn to me and my Charming-ness and maybe then I could settle for the court jester or a traveling minstrel or the jack-of-all-trades I saw working on repairing the waterwheel in town.  At that point would it still be considered "settling" if I had the attributes I find desirable in Prince Charming and then love between myself and a serf?

Don't get me wrong, I'm still a huge fan of yours, you're still on my Christmas AND birthday wish lists since just about forever, but if there's only one of you, and there are how many me's?  I'm just trying to figure things out so everyone can win.

Anyway, if things don't work out with Cinderella/Snow White/Rapunzel/Sleeping Beauty, give me a call.

Yours ever,
Brianna

P.S.  I found this super cute poem that I thought you might enjoy: Prince Charming.

Prince Charming vs. Dragon

"Someday your Prince Charming will come.  Mine just took a wrong turn, got lost, and is too stubborn to ask for directions."

- Unknown